A Rough Rainy Day

I'm not sure what that is a photo of, but it captured how I felt today. In addition to the rather depressing rain, I also just did not feel like serving people today. On a typical day, I will bend over backwards to help anyone who stays here to enjoy their time. It's not only my job, but as a steward of this great place it is also my responsibility.

But today I didn't want to. I know God never said "well, serve with all your heart when you feel like it." In fact, he said something much different than that.

In Romans 12 it says just the opposite.

Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.
I read once that the worst part of a living sacrifice is that they keep trying to crawl off the altar. I think that is where I am right now. I want to serve God with all my heart, mind, body, and soul, but today it just wasn't there.

The crazy thing is that I have a peace about it as well. I think God is aware of how tired I am and how much my soul is just aching for good worship and fellowship. He knows that I (and my family) are in a dry desert right now.

Tomorrow we are trying yet another church. I am hopeful that God is waiting for us there.


Zach Starkebaum said...

I'll keep you in my prayers tonight. Keep on keeping on...

joshua.michael said...

I think mothers feel that same way sometimes because there is no getting out. What helps us survive is knowing we are no the only ones in this condition. That is why we have little indulgences, like coffee! You will feel it again....don't despair! We love you guys!